Archive for divorce

Are You Single

Posted in Communications, Men&Women, psychology, Relationships with tags , , on September 2, 2013 by ichas8440

ichas8440_Graphics_AreYouSingle_Lips2013Secret City, My kinda place.  If you can handle it, I’ll take you there.  On second thought, with the strong possibility of sensory overload, maybe just a visual from the gate.  Visuals can be…  Somewhat provocative.  Stimuli, running, you knowing that this was like that and…  I held if from you.  The emotions will register, ecstasy will flood your system and the blame…  Will come my way for not only keeping this, beautiful reality from you, but…  Slowly your senses will be reclaimed by the false allusions as in reference material you’ve accepted as fact for way too long and..  Lawsuit will become your primary thought all because you’ll say, “I wasn’t really expecting that and you should have prepared me better, I mean, you know they say some things are better left hidden”.  Well then, hide your desire to follow the crowd and, continue the ride as you experience sights and sounds that tell ‘ya…


Oh yes, FOLK always lookin’ for another to blame cause responsibility is never something human kind wanna accept.  Still, a perimeter point of observation will give you enough of a glimpse, allowing for a clear manifestation of  the intuitive stimuli.  And…  When you feel the tingle caused by acceleration of biological components, don’t worry.  Immerse yourself, feed.  During this un-anticipated mode remember one thing.  The Doctor is on deck.  I won’t overload. let ‘cha slip.  Becoming too caught up in this new found knowledge of self and kind.  Besides, once the vibe takes you to the deeper dimensions of; “the self”, where you contemplate…  Imagine, while envisioning the full capacities you’re just been made privy too, you’ll begin to understand one thing.  It really is all about the self.

“Aura; Are You Single.”  Soul Duo from Back-In-The-Day and another anthem destine for the scared category.  Commanding Bass line, locks in with the heartbeat, sorta’ like complimenting spirits.  You feel it, conclusion, “I belong”.  Lyrics that flow.  Allowing you to settle in, at least for once without having to explain yourself.  Dedication surfaces, it becomes easier to listen knowing a realization is on the rise.  One that says, “I can roll like this too“.  Feel good, hunnn. Now, let’s continue the ride.

Another influential couple, (see celeb of the times and almost any will do) ultimately exposed for being a part of the common domain.  Their significant other stepped outside the mutually agreed upon circle of…  Love.  Participated within another’s field.  Now, probably due to outside disturbances, separation isn’t even a consideration and they move to “Lawyer-up”, want explanations on how to achieve the commanding position during a divorce proceedings.  Doesn’t matter the reasons or motivations to move in this direction and at such a speed because.  Choice of extra curriculum has placed their image at stake.  Thoughts of what other FOLK will assume has…  Over-ridden the actual primary directive when two engage.  right, all that matter is…  These trending blips and their quickly arrived at conclusions keep a smile on my face.  Situations like these have created a supportive rally cry.  Reserved for women who, display un-wavering support for the female who…  The other female invade on.  Surprising for the many I would say, but.  I’m from a different school of thought.

Is it that FOLK don’t know or.  Is it that males won’t accept the reoccurring/redefining bond existing between females when one has been publicly; humiliated?  Wrong on your first answer and still wrong if you’ve settled for either of these choices as your answers.  This isn’t American or anywhere else where you have but two sides representing whatever side you think you should come from in presenting your side.  In this case; The Twist.  Always the Twist, especially when I’m presenting the conclusion.  My spin; The female who “played” with the male who made every indication of being single/available for her to see, was…  Merely being “she”.  She is who she is, one who saw a male.  A male that was capable of causing an internal biological discord.  A condition demand immediate personal satisfaction, dismissing all the signs of him being attached, and.  Commanding her to push and follow the leader.  Appearing as predicated, available for him to see.

There was a time when I…  “Hit one up”, eased forward while making my way over to another.   Enjoying her time and…  Re-enacting the same roll, following the same script when her time on the stage came to an end also.  Those cycles (times when this happened), I identified long ago.  Call it Seasons and with those Seasons what I did was done with the mental awareness and acceptance of those I engaged, but.  Where I played wasn’t ever from the same geo-social-graphical arena which is what most do when doing the same thing.  And they wonder how they get caught up in the first place.

Was I wrong?  Was this life, selfishly motivated?  Did I have a moral obligation based on some values etched into my DNA from way back when, telling me not to continue in this direction?  I won’t subscribe to dueling realities played out because of some pre-coding within my ego and super-ego.  I believe in the definition of the Id.  Combat between any internal representative of the self is…  Let’s channel that guy from Sparta “King Leonidas”.  His line is superb about now, “Madness“.  Perfect fit to define, and…  Even if I had been single the basic nature of man and kind is to mingle, so this isn’t a case of what is right or wrong.  Morally, ethically or otherwise, and yes.  Like Sparta, knowing who you are is the first consideration when dealing with everybody else.

When committed to another you’ve gotta realize the depth of the commitment within you.  Think about “The Dog”.  It’s not the dog in the fight it’s the fight within the dog which will determine who will be victorious.  During those days of “Romantic Inclusions“, I played hard, pushed farthest, ferried faster and always, came from the position of “A Wide Receiver”.  The entire activity, fuel for me and if not for the forays I wouldn’t have ever arrived at where I am today.

What about the one waiting at home, preparing for your ultimate return?”  How could I forget?  Surprisingly, I hadn’t.  As said, FOLK are aware of whom they’ve stepped to.  What ‘cha do with one, will be done with another if the circumstances present themselves in the like or similar dimensions so no matter what you do.  To say the concerns of who’s waiting at home, definitely alone, is…  Like the King again who said it best.  “Blasphemy!”  Yes, I have empathy, still, I’d be lying if I even alluded to being stopped from doing what I did.

This is rocket science.”  Hummm, do you know how to pilot a Rocket ’cause I don’t.  What this is is everything plain and simple.  Up close, personal and in your face.  Think digital projections.  With advanced technology nothing is left missing from the sight of your eye.  Blemishes, revealed with clarity.  Previous point of interpretation, finally removed.  Compromise, not even a thought now, so rocket science, no.  I come in vivid color for the pure enhancement of your perceptions.  The Mis-Education of He and She has been forever in flux.  Re-formatted with the beginning of each Gen. so every Gen. will forget their intuitive abilities and…  Argue the obvious.  Like many are privately considering doing right now, but.  Don’t.  Stay locked in and get this…

Despite the Seasons when one sees another curiosity replaces what may be considered rational.  Possibilities of what can be, are…  Immediately pronounced.  Inclusion, demanded and…  This becomes your manifest destiny.  This is what few know with even less who do know realizing the true implications, let alone the consequences of what’s about to be.  This is knowledge on the Fifth Phase.

Those days, these days, “Just One of ‘Dem Days“, and.  I took everything personal.  Where the dis-connect comes where He and She are concerned is thinking nothing is personal .  Everything one engages in is personal.  If it wasn’t nothing, no one would ever be approached, considered or engaged.  Personal involvement is how dreams manifest in a physical world, becoming viral concepts moving to the ultimate.  Your established realities. “Food For Thought” and I’ll slip right back in with this.

Haters, those who’ve continually spread these false impressions about what’s goin’ on between males and females have pushed me to want to…  Elaborate on the philosophy regarding “Common and Elite” and how this relates to the characteristics of personality which…  Keep this “Are You Single” phenom in rotation, and so.  I morph into this part of the presentation.

It was so dark, the approach, I didn’t see coming, still.  The confrontation didn’t surprise or make me feel as if I was out classed.  She stood, comfortably in my zone, something she had done many times before, ‘cept.  This time she was accompanied by a Beast.  One who didn’t disguise he came in full Gorilla form.  Observing his posturing in the background I quickly surmised, he was an ornament.  Decoration.

As suddenly as they appeared, they receded, blending in with the darkness, never turning their backs to me.  She spoke during this dramatic withdraw.  Her words, scripted like the departure, and words which could have been said years ago.  Like I considered the what ifs, if I heard those words years ago, I knew now, I wasn’t fazed by them.  I knew why she felt the need to say them and why she calculated her stalking plans.  Intercepting me when she felt I’d be “burnable”.

More DRAMA.  The car they rode in, slowed right across from me, and she added to her performance.  Reaching over, takes the Gorilla’s chin and kisses him.  Suddenly Foolio gained a stronger sense of empowerment.  Turns sharply, opens the drivers door, steps out and walks menacingly towards me.  He didn’t only look the part, he also capture the essence of the character he portrayed.  His words, weren’t what was apart of his assigned script.  She, being out of ear-shot allowed him to improvise.  He went off  the reservation, delivering something less likely to elicited a physical response from me.  Then, they were gone.

My Auntie once said she was chased out of her birth country by someone with dual imagery.  the celebrated and legendary Poncho Villa.  Poncho’s media team spun it as an eviction of those who were of the elitist crew.  I often wondered was she run off because she was of the elite or.  Because she was an elitist.

My Ex, asked me that night on the corner, or.  Rather told me this, “You think you’re all that, well I’m here to tell you you ain’t shit“.  She didn’t get it then and she probably still hasn’t got it.  I refused to respond because the situation nor the circumstance warranted my reply.  She had done things to me, with me and for me she’d never cop to no matter who made the inquiry.  Not even those close female friends or.  The Beast she was now masquerading around with, pretending to be a couple.  Deep deep in love.  She, being a woman with another shouldn’t have made it her mission to find me just so she could publicly tell me I wasn’t all that.  But like I said, she didn’t get it.

Another, an Elder cousin said I am original just as every human being is, so why would anyone want whom they’ve set their sights on to be…  common?  FOLK step to another based on the spectacular impression made onto ’em once seen and probably heard.  Uniqueness displayed by an individual is what attracts.  The only commonality is the thought of knowing they know you know they see your light.  Imagine if you were cloned.  There’d be no need for anyone to want you because “you” are like every other clone drafted from the DNA producing you.  Replaceable even under the worst case scenario.  Consider a world of sameness.  It’d be a living hell.  Whomever you spoke with, whoever you’d end up sleeping with would be…  A false face to you because.  You wouldn’t be able to distinguish if they were them or.  The clone of another clone impersonating you.

I come from something which is why, I’ll always identify with that of which I step from.  My standards are unto me, not…  Based on what someone else impressed on me.  A guy I knew was willing to pay me to be his second.  Wifey would be the “Wide Receiver”.  When I told him sloppy seconds weren’t for me and when anyone brings someone in to act as a second, they have basically opened the door for disaster.  He, shot back with the same thing my Ex expressed.  “You think ya all that“.  Without responding verbally, he knew I was far from…  Being common and assuming I was all that.  In his own slow thought processing patterns he knew this was a redundant statement.  Why else would he ask me to do for his Wifey what he was evidently incapable of accomplishing.  Ignorance comes in various flavors.

FOLK need to stop pretending they don’t want to be, elite.  The difference between an elitist an being elite is…  Your value system, the moral code you’ve accepted and how you relate to another.  When you are an Ah, (see Ass Hole), you can’t deny it.  You stank way before you arrive and.  You are quick to tell everybody else, they are the ones who stink.

My Auntie, married to the same man for over 5 decades.  After he ascended she remained, solo.  She spoke with men, probably dined with some men who had something to say.  Her heart, it remained with the love of her life.  When she settled in America, she kept the values that provided her the happiness she sought.  She was loved because she didn’t treat people any different than how she knew she had better be treated.

My ‘lil one says she won’t live in the ghetto.  She is accustomed to having things.  Young, but this is what she knows based on who she is.  She is also, warming, genuine, a smart mouth with a very insightful opinion.  I agree with her because this is the value system we come from.

If I was common, the next thing I’d be said to be was normal.  What is normal?  Is normal just conforming to what is expected?  Being normal is to be accepting when you know you deserve another but.  Refusing to step or even acknowledge them because they are of another class.  The norm dictates, “They are way outta your league sooooo“.  No, not for me.  I’m not staying at home because my league has placed psychological boundaries in my orientation precluding me from seeking outside my field of review.  Even if it’s for dialogue.  I want in.

Hold up, what does this have to do with being Single?”  I’m glad you’ve remained focused. Now, re-read all that you’ve already absorbed, and.  Embrace your re-birth.  Single is nothing more, at least in this sense, than being onto yourself while remaining true to yourself.  Single is understanding the applications of Elite as opposed to harboring hidden agendas that tell you, I’m an Elitist.  Are You Single?  You will always be single.  Available?  That’s another dimension of life and like the foolish ass celebs who are actually common FOLK, when you don’t understand who you are, who it is you’ve  attached yourself too and forget the process blinking serves.  Fall fast asleep and forget your responsibilities to who you are and who it is you’ve secured yourself to, the single part of you begs to morph.  Transform and enter the minglin’ zone.  That is, between the sheets where there is always the possibility of…  Awakening, realizing you’ve drifted outta your lane and can get back, but.  The long lasting effects have already defined you.  It’s not about being single, it’s not limiting yourself to the category of wanting to mingle.  You…  Like the delectable one…  R!

Psssss;  When chance permits, check out the lyrics by Aura’s cut, “Are You Single”.  Many have taken the words and crafted a tune.  None are as relative as…  Aura.  Original means none like you.  Single in this sense means, I know who I am.  Common…  Hummm, has no…  Aura.


Players Mist

Posted in Communications, Men&Women, psychology, Relationships with tags , , , , , on January 22, 2012 by ichas8440

L.A., where everyone has something to say.  Especially with regard to the terms pertaining to the “Big D” of Kobe & Vanessa Bryant were made public.  “V” departed with three mansions and 75 mil after hangin’ in for 10 yrs and a day.  Oh yeah, minus the pre-nup which is usually standard operating conditions were major money is generated by one of the other, V stepped like many females would love to.  Did she play Kobe because she knew of his activities way before the women running in her circle decided to bust Kobe out and tell her what they felt she needed to know?  Did Kobe play himself because of his failure to put the pre-nup in place way before V put in 10 and a day satisfying cali law pertinent to marriage?

My questions is, who played who?  It was alleged that Kobe participated in way too much extra curriculum outside his marriage, while V wouldn’t even consider it.  Maybe yes maybe no, I won’t speculate on who did what.  Or, who played who.  The qualifying factors gathered in defining “Player“, oh yeah; is in everybody.  This I do know, no matter who you are, where you wanna align yourself, you have an agenda.  Some are straight-up in your face, a la “This Is How I Do It“.  While you have those who engage the opposite sex, “smile ‘an profile” yet never even blink at the idle impressions of indiscretions.  Then, bam.  You’re hit with all these allegations and while you try to get a grip on what it is you are confronted with, the legal folks are dippin’ deep into your pockets.  Never once being recognized for who and what they are, only perceived as representing their client during a time of despair.

What is goin’ on?  What is really going on!  I’ll tell ya cause you really ain’t tryin’ to recognize the real.

Everyone is playing in one fashion or form.  Playing for position, playing to place.  Like a horse race, you’ve got to show to place, and if you cannot place you will not be in a position to ever win.  Straight-that!

People love to recite this term “Play on Playa“.  I hear it when I’m strolling in the park, sighting while enjoying the mall, I’ve even heard the same term while standing in the rear of most corporate elevators watching others board.  Then there are those who’ve incorporated another way of phrasing this term, which goes like this; “You Playa You‘”.  As for this latter one, the person reciting it can usually be found with a somewhat perplexing facial expression, almost as if wanting immediate recognition but not sure if they will get it.  Urban lexicon especially those germane to American English define a Player as one who manipulates women to gain the sexual or financial advantage.  Personally I know exactly what a Player is and…  “Real Talk” there is no distinction with the application of the word based on race, sexual orientation or gender.  I guess things are applied according to what is favorable or.  Who’s writing the story and how what it is as your subject of contention has impacted you; positive or negative.

When narrow-minded ones calculate their steps while crossing my path, occasionally I hear the mumbling of words under their breath.  Words which make up a sentence such as, “I know he’s a Player“, “Oooh girl look at how he is dressed, and check his swag, he’s gotta be a Player“.  These are the types I just wanna say, “‘itch you don’t even know me“, but.  Like a seated Judge who must recluse themselves because they know more about what is actually being present, I do the same.  Yeah, some who are in the mix, running their mouths, really have no idea of what’s really evolving.

Check this, define “hater“.  Hold-up, don’t even engage but allow me.  Hater; one who is envious and re-acts from a position of ignorance.

Check this too, when you think no body is looking at you, what do you really think and do?

Psssss;  Life, it’s a constantly evolving situation.  Maybe, just maybe I’m finally in the mix, revolving right along with those who are meant to…  Evolve.