Dedicated to Q&A that revolves within the sphere of…  You’ve got it.  What I specialize in.

InnerPersonal Communications.


Q. Say man why don’t ‘cha stop playin’ with these people?  What ‘cha talkin’ about ain’t nothin’ to play with.  You know I know so go on and take the“2 off the 10” and really show these FOLK how to win!  Quiet as kept that’s why I refer to you as, “The Real Doctor Phil”.  Too many of us didn’t see you comin’ but you’re here.  Let these people know that you do this for real.  This is “us” man!

A.  Thank you Vee.  But aren’t you the one who assisted me in identifying “That Expiration Date” as it relates to He&She? Then let me do this.  Next time I’m in The Bay we’ll take in some salty air, sit along the the boardwalk, behind some glass, and do what we do best.  Kick Game and soar in our recognition of life.  In the mean time…  Yes, I put you on blast!  Much Love…


Q-1. Like the post on Smedley.  May sound strange but…  I’m not a stalker so will you please forward my e-mail address to this man?  XOXOXO

Q-2. Where are the pics?  People!   You and those written about?

A-1. The first part of this question came in, let’s say; multiples.  As for the X&Os, I really don’t do the kissy thing, especially on the first date.  I mean, thank you for the attention, e-mails and all, but…  Right, I’m not trying to go there.  This platform is about enhancing you.  Showing all how to, “Stay in the Game”. On Smedley’s digits and all, no can do!  Breach of Contract.  And to secretly pass on your digits, I mean…  Where is the dignity!  You all are better than this.

A-2. This sort of response came in amounts also.  So again, let me put it out there on this level.  I am from the area Hollywood was founded in.  Hollywood is indicative of an all day lolly pop.  You lick and lick and at the end you have ingested wasted calories.  Hollywood.  Situations created, news leaks pushed out in every direction.  All for that continuous exposure to confirm what?  Pic, pictures, snapshots, graphics, whatever.  We don’t do that.  I don’t do that.

When we began this journey we laid out our position based on standards, procedures & applications that would guarantee us a positive arrival point.  I won’t get into standards from an exploratory point as that is reserved for a different post.  And this is gonna put you in your feelin’s, but the real is.  We aren’t here for “visual entertainment”.  If, and this is a huge “if”.  If we drop a pic. many of you would go on the “hunt”.  Maybe the flava’ you see and who isn’t what you want  or expected.  And don’t say you didn’t have any preconceived notions!  Now, because you didn’t get what ‘cha wanted you pump your chest and set out to practice that drama you’ve imagined yourself to be.  Say, King Kong.  “Big mistake.  Huge mistake.”  Which is why we will tell you this isn’t Hollywood.  We know that it’s wild out there.  This Internet, ain’t no joke.  Plus, we have the system of survival set up ’til.  Right.  We’d wait on you to start your hunt, allow you to think you have captured us and then…  Watch you “pray” as you transgress into the prey.  To be safe, think privacy.  Then consider anonymity.

T ‘n T;

Q: I really really like what you’ve done for me and Troy.  Since talking with you he’s like a changed person.  I mean…  I won’t lie to…  Tammy

A: Right about now, I wanna take a nice glass of water, very cold water and toss it right in your face.  But I won’t.  Not because this isn’t professional or knowin’ that you will probably run and tell it to the nearest regulator body.  No, being professional is many times subjective, and as for that veiled threat of being sued based on whatever you “think” I’ve violated…  First you need to understand what (burden of proof) means in a legal environment.  Sooooo, let’s remain above the drama and deal with the facts.

I stopped ya’ short of completing your question because in the beginning of our consultation I asked that you to; “keep it real” whenever you come to me!  Remember, and you agreed.  Yet now, you step to me and straight out tell me you won’t lie to me!  Woman please.To acquire anything that is going to put you forward, especially in your quest to better yourself the one thing you’ve gotta do is…  Yeap, drop the drama.  That lie issue, miss me with it.  Just say what is.  Forget the color commentating alright.  This is live but it isn’t T.V. .  The lie thing, view that as color.  It’s just you and I, Troy isn’t even present. Okay.

Psssss; In recognition of those who were expecting me to blast my client’s business by exposing her to the world by defining with great detail what takes place in our personal consultations; No can do.  The point of this exercise is to identify how we engage our daily lives and forget that those same lives are coming in real time and not segments.  The lie part is the focus of this presentation.  Now, forget Hollywood and that segue thing.  This is what is known  as; you’ve got it.  Keepin’ it real.  I’m out…


Q: I have been married for years, my children are grown and living outside of our home.  Recently I discovered that my husband was cheating.  Oh, I know that we’ve been having difficulties for sometime,but…  The betrayal is with someone close to both of us.  I want to leave him because of his disrespect of our marriage.  Total disregard of what we had.  I know I’m older but…  Then there is the side of me that wishes to remain.  forgive him, try to patch things up.

A: Your marriage if traditional should have been founded in faith.  Faith is knowing without having tangible evidence.  Like this union being yours, it was also his, hence.  You didn’t recently discover anything as you had experienced him for years.  The beautiful off-spring are proof of that.  Betrayal is always subjective where two are involved.  I won’t champion his actions nor dignify yours.  I feel for ‘ya which is why I have to share these views with you.  What is definitely at risk now, is your mental state, just as his is.  He has shown that something is missing by his “drifting”, but you didn’t say he left the house.  Therefore…  Right, you have discovered what you always knew of your man.  He can fall to temptations of desires, especially when someone “close” presents a package.  Sometimes those close are the most dangerous, they know what’s goin’ on in your house.

Rest your mind, your husband is not a stranger in your house.  If you are in love and not just of the mind to say you have love for him, stick around.  Talk with him and not at him.  Express to him what your needs are and don’t just bang on his chest in an attempt to expel your anger.  As well, take a step back and listen to what he may have concluded as the reason for his departure from, “your house” if you get my projection.  I’m not taking this situation casual at all, but…  Emotions are tricky right about now.

Psssss. This is my client.  I know them and not just of ’em.  knowing requires the passage of time.  What has been express as a “corrections” to there situation should be seen as one of those pre-emptive strikes.  Nothing is pre-emptive, as everything is based on motives,  Seen and hidden.  As for the “elaboration”  No can do.  Because you are a stranger in their house.  Let them clean it up.


Q: Man I’m gonna kill her.  I’m gonna beat her into next year.  She treats me like I don’t exist.  She is way too close with that faggot ass boss of hers.  Every time I call her on the telephone the line, she doesn’t answer.  Then a few minutes after I had called, she calls me back with another lame excuse.  I know she’s messing around on me.

A: First of all you aren’t about to kill anything, let alone allow anything to die.  Besides, beating that ass will only result in you going to jail.  She spending money to pay your bond, but not until she has had her fill of those girlfriends.  You know the ones with all the negative advice.  Calm down and sit down.  Okay, have I gotten your attention?  Good, as for the boss, if he’s gay don’t sweat it.  And don’t even take it to another level and imagine that he’s bi.  Just leave it alone.  What I suggest is that you focus and do you.  It’s obvious that there is something out of align within your relationship.  You can do this by…

Psssss. Its not easy livin’ up to the “hype” one creates.  If only you’d leave those media creations out of your life.  My client didn’t hire a P.I. so no proof.  He’s functioning from many thing imaginary.  Again, I know the history.  Remember, I do this!  And no, I don’t seem to take this too serious.  Why should I, you aren’t the client.

Q. I know that I’ve been texting you.  Blowin’ up your e-mail.  Wearing out your cell phone’s voice mail but I have to know!  Know if I should leave my boyfriend.  I mean my best friend who’s a great person told me to leave him.  Said he was a dog, and.  She seems to know men because she’s left every man she’s had and because they either hit or, cheated on her or…  Then there is my boss, she has seven kids and is doing fine in raising them all by herself.   Anyway she advised me to leave my boyfriend.  I just don’t know what to do, can you help me?  I don’t wanna leave him, and don’t tell this to anyone, please.  But, I haven’t been the greatest or most faithful either.  But, like I said, this is in the strictest of confidence, right?

A.  (See misery), then vibe on your relationship.  This means what is goin’ on between the two of you and not the many.  Meaning those on the outside tryin’ to “get in”!  Right, that girlfriend thing is like my boyz thing.  My boyz can always tell me what’s cool, but they are seldom cool with what they have.  Their eyes, yes they roam in public.  Seek and find every skirt that passes by.  And imagine, we aren’t even in Rome so why are they doin’ like the Romans?  My point exactly, You have to do you!  You’ve said it yourself, you haven’t been…  Well there is no need to reiterate, you are the only one who knows the real score.  The analogy, yes, it comes from a game implying competition.  But, in the game of life, sometimes you are up, sometimes he will be up.  The key to a successful engagement is to play fair.  So ask yourself, would you like for him to take your business to those who really don’t have either of your business in their best interest?

Psssss. I cannot, will not, and don’t intend to make a decision for anyone.  I can only shed light.  To expect anything more would mean that you have step to one seeking knowledge and in your quest have settled for less even before you have…  Right, explored your own involvement in what it is, you have presented.  I told ‘ya, I do this!

Ms. California;

Q. Your boyz played the roll of managers while you set in the cut and checked a girl out.  Remember me?  I still have not forgot how you mashed me on “WHY”  Quincy Jones didn’t put me on.  Yeah you remember me?  I’m really into your blog and luvin’ everything you say.  My husband is hatin’ on you like always!  But you know brothers are like that.  I want to comment on something about domestic violence.  Something you told me back in the day.  These chicks seem to feel that when a man beats ‘dat ass, and crys for your sympathy afterwards.  Dontcha see this a being classic spousal abusers.  Will you comment on that with the same elaboration you opened me up to?

A.  Hey lady, I do remember you and I wanna apology for not approaching you like I should have;  “Back in the Day” as you say.  But you know we live, grow and learn.  During that phase of my existence I was steep into self  with that music thing just being an option to make it happen when engaging people like you.  Well you can look at this C&R situation with the recent developments on the manager points.  This will give a clearer picture of how things can appear one way, when the real is completely different.  Good to get the “reach out”, and yes you touched me.

To speak on those classic symptoms of spousal abuse.  “I never got into that isolating spousal thing.  It always sounds sexist, but I can go with it.”  As then, if I recall, you were hit and made to feel lesser than large.  Basically a tactic used to reduce your esteem, but…  I still agree on what I said then as it applies today.  Just because a spouse becomes locked in that “whoop ass mode” goes off and doesn’t cry after the fact.  his actions don’t change the cause and effects of the attack.  D.V. is legally wrong but the judicial system along with the Law Enforcement bodies that engage those who defied the laws,  seldom address other factors that the attack generates.  And you know I can come with some real talk on the law, but I don’t sweat any ones rational or un-seen motivations under the colors of authorities.  regardless of who comes to the rescue, those whys and what fors have to be considered and approached or there will never be a resolve.  “Now I remember you clearly”.

Just because you separate the two, it doesn’t change the characteristics of what had been developed between the two who were engaged in battle from the beginning.  Feelings become.  Your master which is the co-dependency, will still move you to wanna adhere to the one you love and have been with despite of all the outside interventions.  To rise above this and hopefully not have to re-visit the arena ever again, you’ve gotta understand all aspects of the engagement.  Or at least, try.  Which is what this C&R thing has spawned in our society.  “Hopefully.”

I will not get into depth via Q&A but I think this will satisfy what you wanted me to see, understand and address by means of de-constructing your question.  Again I appreciate you.

Psssss. If this is from who I think it is, she was sexy then and knows how to engage the sensual with the sexual to arrive at her identified destination.  And no I am not lost in sight of what I am addressing, so those “politically correct types” please, save the drama.  I enjoy what I’m doin’ and as then, so is it now.  “Psychologically hard to re-live and deal with what she lived wit.  Her being hit while he standing in the mirror looking at himself, but not showing any emotions after the scene.  This is to read, “baby baby, baby, pleeease forgive me, I won’t do it again”.  Right, he didn’t cry if you haven’t figured that out.  I am not a doctor and even if I was, I wouldn’t get into the classifications of traits, characteristics and all, of psychotic and sociopath types.  But…  I will stand pat on this.  Those whys and what fors must be sought, because if not, when those emotions run amok again.  And yes they will get outta control, again.  He will probably; Do it again.  Assistance on all levels needs to be provided both ways.  Without bias!


Q. We had a fight.  He didn’t hit me, oh no, he’s so not into that.  Really he just yelled a lot, told me I was full of B.S. .  Said you were full of the same thing.  What surprised me was that when I said “if he’s full of B.S. to, then I will cancel our next session”.  He said no, don’t cancel nothing!  The look on his face, I haven’t seen him so serious since he proposed.  I need help here.

A. Let me tell you something, B.S. has two distinct characteristics.  First it stanks!  Two if it touches you it sticks!  Don’t concern yourself with verbal slights, a lot of times people attempt  to “re-project” in a verbal sense.  Meaning, what is said to or of them is “pushed” towards another.  This deflection has no weight, don’t give it any.  Also, the fight had a trigger and don;t immediately internalize it and assume it was your fault.  Knowin’ the circumstances consider this options, males are masters of “flippin’ the script” when they are caught or up to something.  if everything was cool before he left, but when he came back in it wasn’t, it might be best to, look at who’s making the noise.  Again, don’t trip it.  On that canceling thing, tell him “don’t play with my money”.  That man loves me as much as you do, and he ain’t goin’ no where.  No really I appreciate you doing what you felt was right by not show division within your house.  But the real, next time mention to him that he and I have a signed confidentiality agreement.  What I will not do is breech his confidence by sharing what he has expressed to me, to you.  What I will do is tell you that…  On that B.S. thing, he is comin’ to me much more than you.  He is attempting to straighten himself out with my assistance.  But, like many males, they won’t give another man any props especially if that man is inspiring and motivating his woman.  Hey, it’s a little males complex, but don’t let it worry you.  Next time ask him to define a male and them have him do a comparable with that definition onto what a man is.  Now check this out.  I have been told by many females that I was full of B.S., but when I respond back with.  “I believe in me, and I really am not about to allow you to put me in any of your imaginary categories which support your fantasies”  they laugh.  You see, those that believe in self, love self and do for self.  Well, eventually they reach a point where assistance can be extended to everybody else.  Like your man, so are many of the females I’ve encounters.  They hear me, feel my words and love what I do for them.  But when I don’t do what they expect me to do.  Right, they are quick to sling that B.S. thing into the convo..  Hey lady, stand on you!  Not on them or what they assume you need to stand on!


Q. Say dawg what ‘dat be like.  On the real this domestic violence…  Man thats some serious shit.  I don’t hit LaDonna and since kickin’ it wit you, let ’em know dawg.  breathe on ’em cause I wasn’t knowin’ so ya’ know they ain’t up on that shit.

A. Plain and simply.  This client wasn’t “underwater” in his relationship, not even close to the shore!  Yet, D.V. has many categories that one can fall under, if…  If they wanna enforce the laws and apply them to you as they have been written.  That is, after your significant other reaches out to the cavalry.  Seeking immediate “air support” with full ground units deployed followed by a “quick evac” of the male from his domain.  This couple hadn’t ever been violent towards one another, but…  Right, one day he pushed her down on the bed when she stopped him from leaving the house.  She, hopped up and shoved him back.  He hit the wall, and with force, but…  The perception will be that he is the male, therefore he is dominate in a physical sense.  Even if the wifey initiated the contact, it won’ t matter or be of concern.  Evidence, not admissible.  What he acquired from me is…  As mentioned when I began, plain and simple!  But if you didn’t know, now ya know!


Q.  Excuse me sir, did you read BeBe Winans got served a warrant for domestic violence?  Married for 16 yrs then pushed the wife down.  A Preacher.  He’s even got some of that celebrity stuff goin’ on.  What you say about it?

A. (See The Human Condition).  Next, you ask me what do I have to say, and my come back can only be; “What’s your point?” D.V. takes place on all levels within our society.  The characteristics, conditions and traits will be identified on every layer where people exist.  So what!  I don’t know you but I don’t feel that I’d be too far off in imagining that there were probably some instances when you pushed someone.  Maybe ‘ol Lizabeth spoke up at the wrong moment.  Remember that time when you and Jeb were drinking beer and you didn’t wanna hear her mouth?  Got off your tractor, shuffled over to her then shoved her in the face as you and Jeb stepped over her and scooted down along “the big lane”, (reads highway).  Headed down to Slim’s gas station.  The wifey, probably had been reduced to tears, and let’s not forget the mess you made of her clothes.  Well guess what?  You elected yourself as a likely candidate into the world of criminal custody.  How you ask, but in your case, you won’t ask, just  “wonder” as you scratch your head, pushin’ your baseball cap back!  Don’t trip Bubba, I’ve just taken the liberty of providing some color.  Simply to prove a point, okay, stay with me and put down the ax.  Under the elements of psychological intimidation that could result in emotional or great bodily harm as defined within the statute of D.V. you didn’t step over the line.  No Bubba,   you jumped into the fryin’ pan, so to speak !  And Jeb, he’s in it too.  He can be charged with conspiracy.  And guess, he can also pick his poison.  Conspiracy for failure to report a crime, conspiracy before and after the fact of having knowledge of a crime.  Conspiracy for participation in the commission of a crime.  The list goes on.  But ‘ya know Bubba, time is money and I see that you have just sent me another e-mail and right about now, I don’t have anymore time to kick this with you.  Oh yeah, someone will answer your other e-mails.  Feel me!


3 Responses to “Splash”

  1. Greeeeeeeeat Blog Love the Infomation you have provided me .

  2. I liked your article is an interesting technology
    thanks to google I found you

  3. Great post, thanks. Can you expand on the 2nd para-graph in a bit more detail plz?

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