Archive for February, 2012

“G versus G”

Posted in Communications, Men&Women, psychology, Relationships with tags , , on February 24, 2012 by ichas8440

Give me my Rum in a tall glass, cut it with a couple splashes of P.P. .  “Nasty, you are just nasty.”  P.P as in pure peach nectar, nothin’ else!  Drop three cubes of ice for the chill and…  Hold the umbrella.

While I slowly sip this exotic concoction I want to hear music, preferably smooth jazz, but…  If the DJ has his heart set on the receding R&B I heard when I stepped through the string bead doors, I’m cool with that too.  As for the lighting.  Oh yeah, though I missed the  flickering strobe thing, blinking in time with the music.  Not a chance, in fact, a nice accompaniment so…  If you will, keep it going, just dim the security lights, seems somewhat intimidating to those wishing to blend in with the shadows.

Club life, Bar activity, take all kinds to make the mix enjoyable.  Especially when you understand the blend.

Many blogs ago I touched on the Chris Brown, Rihanna thing.  My hope was to bring another light to the causes and effects of D.V. (domestic violence).  Some got it, others didn’t.  Now, because of these two celebs putting in work and…  It makes no difference if this union was forged based on personal or professional reasons.  Just the fact of ’em getting together has created another psychological rotation expressing collective disdain everywhere you turn.  Why I ask?  Because of another’s choices.  The real; whose life is all this affecting anyway?

The commercial promoting Dos Equis the beer company and their spokesman who happens to be “The Most Interesting Man In The World” is very revealing.  That is from a contextual point.  “MIM” remaining true to his DNA tells you out front he lives “vicariously“.  With a simple inclusion of an adverb, he’s defines his intent leaving no doubt about who he is, but.  Was anybody paying attention?

A beast in a biological form is usually the results of ‘ucked-up genes that high-jacked the creation process, becoming supreme while doing what they do.  Basically these suppressed ones have established their presence based on the regressive traits as they jump completely over the depress mode becoming, primary building blocks of the life to be.  Fully integrated in their move towards becoming He or She, but…  When that form dominates, becoming totally aggressive while committing an act of D.V as they masquerade as someone civil, everyone suddenly has an opinion.  My question is, how can those who are merely living “vicariously” through the lives of their chosen celebs, have the audacity to even come-up with this opinionated stuff?  Their words, circulating throughout the land like a virus, are straight “cocka”!  I say this because most who “run an tell it” aren’t even aware of the many triggers causing one to react violently, nor are these types conscious to the point of understanding what happens when “blending the mix” occurs.

I have a son who says he’s Blanish.  One of his sisters doesn’t have a clue of who or what she is.  Before them, when I stepped to their Moms, she was living in an  upscale locale within The Valley, socialized with those in Hollywood, but came from intellectual types.  Place of origin; Asuncion Paraguay.  “Damn, how did you get with her producing one whose Blanish and another who doesn’t know what she is?  And what is Blanish?

Blanish is a recently established racial blend.  A mix that hasn’t hit the international nationality defining pool so unless you’re in the geo-rotation, you wouldn’t know.  As for how I got with the mother, consider those genes who high-jacked the creation process.  They arose based on position, opportunity and straight-out luck.  Much like most living entities including yours truly.  Still, I cannot leave it like that as you won’t fully appreciate how I’ve come to arrive at what I’m sharing, so let me break it down a ‘lil further for you all.

My children’s Moms was from one side of the world.  I guess her FAM wasn’t feelin’ it.  Migrated to another spot on the planet, having no intention of their off-spring running into anyone such as yours truly.  And…  As for me…  Genetically speaking, ascended from those kidnapped from their homeland.  A people deposited on shores separated from the original shores by an ocean and…  The point of drop-off  just happened to have been stolen from its original inhabitants, and…  Oh yeah, humans, they come, they see, they want and move forward with all intent of  conquering.  No matter the odds.

The mother of mines being blessed with a physical presence many women only dream about, kicked up the stimulator factor to the fifth degree where I was concerned.  Based on her beauty, I had no desire to stop, re-position or consider the long range possibilities of our culture differences.  Like something out of Wild Russia our exotic blends mesmerized.  Resistance on either of our parts would have been futile.  Our individual cultural differences inspired us to, take on the rolls of Adam and Eve.  We indulged in the juices we had always heard about but were also forbidden to partake in.  Oh, we had standards but they came from our various cultural backgrounds so the typical Laws Of Attraction didn’t apply.  It was a result of those same culture differences as to why we compromised our innate values.  She nor I understood how one was ‘pose to act or re-act given the perception of pressure once intimately involved.  Something which happens in all cultures but never actually get discussed.

What is being said as a result of all this D.V. is redundant.  Confused minds adding to an already confusing public state of denial.  Word is, man should not become physically violent with woman.  Woman should not emotionally or psychologically attack man, but.  All cultures do it, hide after the fact while publicly and privately expressing a true desire never to enter that state of being again.  Real Talk, even with all the positive schools of thought on this issue, society is still divided when it comes to this particular matter.  Seldom does He or She adapt ways in which prevention of the same is maintain.  Can it happen?  Is there a way to stop the violence?  Only if and when the violence has been deemed damaging to all concerned.

I had a woman who happened to let her mouth over-load her ass.  The attack was administered at the hands of another woman.  My woman begged me to…  Well her words went something like this, “Do what cha gotta do just  get this girl off of me“.  How was this to be interrupted?  I knew what she said and clearly understood the full range of her meanings.  Oh, don’t get it twisted, I wasn’t about to leave her out there as she got that ass tapped.  Obliging, I lifted “Ms. Thang “off of my “Motor Mouth”.  Huge mistake because when out of the other woman’s grasp hesitation wasn’t in her mind.  She leaped with a blinding speed, in fact I almost missed it but in grabbing my arm to steady her spin, I couldn’t help but feel the pain.  Now, behind me the verbal barrage erupted for a second time.  Every word from that point on was all about having me commit a violent act against this woman.  My once demur woman was all about.  “Shot that bitch.  Oh yeah, now bitch my man is gonna kill you.”  Failing to do as she commanded placed me on the receiving end.  I was now the target with my prescription being a full dose of her verbal abuse.  My woman had flipped, manifested a side of her I didn’t know existed.

Driving away from the scene of her “beat down”, the eruption magnified.  “Oh, I’m through with you.  All that shit I heard about you, tough guy hun.  Back your woman at all cost.  Yeah, nothin’ but words, a lot of neighborhood drama.  You know, you  ain’t shit.  What was that all about, were  you afraid to shot that bitch?  Don’t even answer that cause I don’t wanna hear your excuses.

First allow me to say, the above story, the one about the trifflin’ female, she and I weren’t even from the same geo-locale.  I hadn’t even spoken a word to her when our eyes initially met.  The attraction was based on the Porsche’.  A car that didn’t establish my mind-set as much as it told her I may have means and then she was hell bent of showing me just how mean she actually was.

Flip the script, moving to another section of all this and…  My Ex. nor Ms. Loud Mouth had any clue of my means or ways because they really hadn’t taken any time to get to know me!  Guess what?  In this melodrama I’m just as guilty as them because I hadn’t read the script either.  Ad lib was in full force despite who was playing the part.  We all were in a rush and to get to what?

When I came up my Pops wasn’t one to put hands on my Moms.  This isn’t to say D.V. wasn’t prevalent in the community.  Outside the house I saw much.  We learn within the house but what is learned many times isn’t practiced once entering the exterior world.  As for those of you who say, “morals”, save it.  Tell me about morals when you’ve reached your last station of emotional solace and have resorted to, “beatin’ that ass”.  Those who come with discipline I say great deflection and that’s all it is.  A move to prolong and avoid what is!  The reality, cultural is relative to emotional, social and psychological dispositions, especially when interacting with one or the other sex.  What separates the beast from the brave.  Brave as in being able to rise above the accepted madness and do you minus the physical damage easily deliver to the choice of your desire, is…

Whoa, this is not a big step but a huge transition in thought so put down the drink, set the weed back in the tray and listen this way. 

Being of higher intellect humans are ‘pose to have evolved.  If this be the case there’s something else to know.  She is built to push, pull, instigate, invisibly navigate, even biologically pro-create.  But…  She nor He is trying to be on the receiving end of any form of an assault.  No matter the culture spawning the person, people need to be allowed to change.  More so when our perceptions of our lives is based on the “blends mixed”.  Diversification is good but swagger needs to become less explosive and definitely not so re-active because it ain’t goin’ your way.  An evaluation of self and kind needs to happen before and not after or you can bet you’ll get caught-up.

As for those who swear people displaying tendencies a la Chris Brown cannot, will not changed.  You’re need to look in the mirror.  Those who say Rihanna comes from a trifflin’ background, you take a glance at yourself too.  Time allows for growth.  Experiences usher in a moment in which one should think about where they’ve been.  How they’ve sustained and how they will maintain.  B.S. is a staple of those coming from “the peanut gallery”, (see gossiping fools).  Cluck-heads given an audience only creates more turmoil for those who have chosen to exercise an option towards productive resolve.

Within my life I like to see my glass as half full, not ever half empty.  Perception isn’t just an opinion.  It establishes a much smoother way towards understand your reality.

Psssss; G versus G, it’s all about the journey.  Viewing the voyage as an opportunity for  discovery in understanding all the aspect making up “YOU”.  Moving while avoiding traps set throughout society by those comprising the emotional side show.  And…  At the end of the day you have grown based on what ‘cha acquired along your journey.  Knowing you have tendencies that will, at times sprout and move you to wanna just take off on another, but…  It’s not really you, it’s that vicarious lifestyle you think you wanna lead.


“V Day, Va Va Voom”

Posted in Communications, Men&Women, psychology, Relationships with tags , , , on February 9, 2012 by ichas8440

Started out from a culturally related component, morphed, becoming a Christian based day.  Materialistic aspects confirmed and now; totally commercial.

Cupid, on a break from his anticipated activities, took a moment to inhale the roses.  Decided to kick-back, toss down a room temp Brandy and as he did so, casually leaned over and shared with The 22nd G, his observation of the times on his break out day.  Pointing out how people were overly consumed by the chase during the season leading up to…  V Day.  It was evident through mutually identifiable body language, their thoughts originated along the same lines.  Sniffers raised, they saluted themselves and continued to enjoy their favorite mid-day beverage, Grand Marnier.

In further contemplation of people and their motivations, especially during the season of love, I…  Yeah, I’m high-jacking this episode for now.  I could see how commercial everything had become.  Not that commercialism is a bad thing, what is bad is the failure of real communications during this time of human transparency.

Presenting one with a bouquet of flowers isn’t just about running out, finding a bunch that has been arranged correctly and sending them with the quickness to the object of one’s desire.  Nor is it about placing a kiss upon another’s cheek, then nervously step back and immediately reciting some words you have no concept of what they mean or any idea of the impact of expected emotionally achievement.

Romance without timing is like watching a commercial where those presenting the info are racing against the clock.  Hoping to recite all they have to say and before the allotted time define pushes them over budget.  Yeah, imagine watching something that is targeted to and for you.  You sit there, focused and then, realize, “this is a rushed production“.  Or…  It could be something such as, listening to your loved one as they ramble through their words.  Slobber drippin’ from the corners of their mouth and all because they refuse to slow their roll.  break from the babble, taking just a moment to breathe.  Yes, catch a breath, maintaining their physiological composure.  Maybe even by doing so, preserve a chance of future indoctrination into those who are successful in love.  And you listen, intently wondering to yourself; for what?

Previously, way before this point in time, it was brought to my attention as to why I was so manipulative.  I heard this redundant statement and my response was.  “Put yourself in the same situation and you will say (assertive).  Flip-the-script and back to me, the operative word becomes aggressive, self-absorbed and manipulative.  Really F.U.”

Some of us remain in the winners circle all because we don’t allow others to do us by defining our moment in time.  Time is relative, meant to be managed not be managed by.  When Valentines Day comes around, I’m not lost in thought as to what to get.  Racking my mind with the thoughts of what can I do that will put me in a brighter light and then…  Allowing me to score because my loved one will see me as thoughtful.

Thoughtfulness begins at the initiation of thought itself.  Romance like V Day should have been in the equation way before the day seems to be seen coming up over the horizon, but…   People are lost in their own illusions ’til they haven’t even considered how and why to keep the romance in the mix.  And when V Day does appear those who haven’t thought about it, run around searching for the right thing to get and…  Don’t see that it’s not gonna work.  No way, no how and definitely not now.

“I cannot speculate where others are concerned but…  In my world, false presentations are recognized before they ever show up”

Life is simple, basically you give to receive, provide because you would like to see the same come your way.  Life, it’s like this, reach out and talk, give another the respect of your attention cause you really want their attention in return.  Not multi-tasking while you sit  there, pretending to listen but lying about processing every word they’ve said, only to.  Support that BS by attempting to convince them of your acquired abilities to chew bubblegum while walking at the same time.  In fact, why does one feel the need to justify their lack of providing another with undivided attention?  Actually it’s done because he or she whose attempting to convince doesn’t believe themsleves either and…  They know their projected image is’t working well.  What this is, is psychological nonsense.  Much like giving a gift during V Day while talking about how much He or She means to one but…  Images of another or something else altogether has occupied your mind.  Oh yeah, when you serve one with B.S., they know you are all about the a la carte.  Meaning, selfish!

A guy once asked me why did I take his Wifey.  I didn’t even qualify this stupid ass question with an answer.  At another point in time, a female associate during her moment of “reflection“.  Contemplative probably because when she brought this DRAMA my way, I was still doin’ me.  So to save her own diginity, she concocted this idea of inquirying as to “what about us“.  Begged to know how could I take advantage of her during a moment of emotional confusion.  She’s still waiting on an answer too.

You see, when one commits to another, He or She will not fall to the ways of the world, stooping to lows just because the words are divine coming out of another’s mouth.  One who is onto another may dream of others but.  The move isn’t worth the experience of the exploration.  Base-line; no one can take what is yours.  ‘Ol boy never had any claim on his Wifey because a wife doesn’t do what his Wifey was alleged to have been a part of in the first place.  Pretty much his imagination was; over-active.  More so relics of some luggage he carried from his past.  As for ‘ol girl, when you are experiencing a, “as she so eloquently said“, moment of emotional confusion.  How in the hell are you gonna remember what actually took place during that “un-conscious-able” blast from the past?  Emotions, confused, hypnotherapy to regain repressed thoughts and images won’t even achieve that state of awareness.  Really, engage in some “extra curriculum sexual adventures” and trying to put the blame on another; not so easy.  A move much like providing your loved one with something on Valentines Day that was really an after thought because He or She was never the pinnacle of your thoughts in the first place.

Intelligence is something very identifiable.  If one has an aptitude for anything in which they’ve excelled in, there are two things you can base it on.  Innate or acquired.  Romance is something I do because.  Well, I excel in the emotional satisfaction that comes with involvement in this Art.  Plus, it is easy for me to associate any moment extracted from this association and apply it to almost any other aspect of life.  Oh yeah, that “UCC” in full effect.  In this instant this is called transference of knowledge based on insight of same.  Right, doctors don’t do business well because they aren’t orientated like that nor have they exposed themselves to that aspect of life.  Much like those dummies who rush to seek another just for the imaginary benefits assumed the other will provide.  You are in a zone un-familiar to you so the result will be like insanity.  No matter how you do, you keep doin’ it the same way you do, results; always the same.

Each day is not just another day.  Days are what you make ’em to become.  I hate working on cars.  Not because I don’t know the technical aspects of them but because I don’t like to get dirty.  A friend who was working on my car heard this and said to me, “just wash up afterwards“.  Yeah, I felt so simple but.  You know me, critical thinking 101 so I came back with, “I’ve never said I didn’t know how to work on cars“.  Right, I am not the doctor who only knows medicine.  Those bedside manners so needed in other situations, I have that in my DNA too.  My profession will not dictate my methods.  how you are should be predicated on who you are, not what you’ve become.

On that issue about the fella’s Wifey.  Yeah, she and I spent some time together.  I can say it was all in an attempt to share with her the fact that she hadn’t lost a ‘thang and her attraction was constant.  But…  You decide what my involvement was.  On Ms. Thang a la “The Lady In Red“.  Did we steal away into the bamboo forest and show “heels up while someone’s toes were down“.  Was it “I” whom took advantage of a woman in psychological distress?  Hummm, what can I say?  If I must say anything it would be this.  Where I have been, those who’ve been with me were there based on their own conscious decisions.  One talks, another listens, sometimes a ‘lil motivation is needed, but.  The choice will always be theirs.  It’s better that way.  Why love when one is lost in space?  Why engage where one is focused on completing another’s time table?   What’s in one’s mind can be denied but only to those who haven’t…  Mind their own business.  Right, when you do mind your business there is not business you cannot decipher.

Psssss;  Cupid in his moment of down time, drank up all the brandy and now has the munchies.  He’s raided the frig and can’t seem to find his arrows.  I wonder.  I wonder if those arrows are what’s needed to get all those people to recognize that what they are doing on Valentines Day is all a personal choice.  Hummm, traditional gifts or…