“Blip Blam”©

2009 is ’bout to run outta time, and here’s 2010, slippin’ smooth in.  Stay with me as I remix the matters that brought us close.

My intro into your world began with the D.V. issues compliments of the mass media, staring “Chris & Rihanna”.  Hey, don’t get mad at me, if you remember (I didn’t pick a dog in this fight).  To keep it real, I asked all of you to wait.  Wait ’til each side revealed their position before blaming anyone.  I mean, with Rihanna going from good girl to straight-out freakazoid with her graphic promotional campaigns.  I guess this was a concerted effort in an attempt to channel those seductive passions and aggressions.  But hey, with the allegations that came out after she had supposedly “Fat Mouthed” to Chris, who in-turned opened up a can of (whoop-ass) on her…  You can’t really blame the woman.

I guess many of you felt like me, it was over, but…  We didn’t hear The Fat Lady sing and Elin stood up to take her swing.  “Currrrack”, straight up the side of Tiger’s head.  And look at us, we had no idea she played golf so well.  Showed Tiger he wasn’t the only one who could come outta the “ruff”.  And that Tiger, he never had to run from any police but…  We see that he can move with the best of ’em.  Jumped into the Escalade with the quickness to get anywhere but there.

Well, with the coming of the holidays I just knew it would be cool, but…  Right, ‘Ol Charlie Sheen decided to enter the pool.  It was alleged that Brooke Mueller the other half of that dynamic duo said something to him about divorce.  Everybody knows those are words left unsaid where Charlie threads.  Now we all know that he’s a neck man, and those Nine One One tapes.  They prove he really knows his lines!

Okay, enough…  Christmas was near and…  Here we go again, Mary J. wasn’t about to let anybody mess up her day.  It was intimated that Hubby Isaacs was attempting to flirt with another skirt and Mary J. Blige wasn’t waiting on the Four One One from anyone to tell her something she already knew.  Slugged him like she owned him, which brings me back to where all this began.

Back in the day I knew someone who was also a “Touch Hog”, which is a term meant to define anyone who is waiting to be touched.  Stroked in a way that moves ’em to release the anger that simmers just beneath their skin, bubblin’ and waiting for anyone who plays like their true friend only hiding behind a false grin.  Then…  Without notice the Touch Hog erupts like the sleeping volcano.

Sooooo, with the conclusion of this year let me say that don’t be hesitant to shed a tear whenever your love ones display traits that you fear.  And…  While you do this remember that it was you who allowed ’em to become so dear.

Now with this known let me move it closer to home.  Here’s a special key I possess, I give to you for whenever you encounter similar test.  Celebrities are just like you, you and you.  Politicians, Priest, alleged Super Models, whomever.  They are all just people, individuals who don’t always know what to do.  All of life can be viewed with the same insights one would have when watching a sunrise or sunset.  When you have the opp. to see one of these natural occurrences, pump your breaks, step back and contemplate the real beauty that emits from deep within such a magnificent reality.  (e.g. your other half).  After the experience has been absorbed, whomever you’ve encounter that “closes the door” causing you to wanna get all ugly.  Just know that who stands on the other side of that door hasn’t revealed every aspect of how they can be.  Just like the sunrise or sunset, no two are the same.

Okay, let’s end this year on a positive note.  It’s been fun, I’m gonna run and next year will kick this thing up another notch.  Keepin’ all of us sharp and forever ready.

Psssss;  Alright, for those of you who have assumed that I’m taking a very serious subject that plagues our society and making a mockery of it, I’ll suggest this.  Do like you do and miss me while I…  Enjoy my Cap-Back, head up watchin’ the fireworks in the sky.  Oh, the Cap-Back.  What is it?  (Captain Morgan Spiced Rum backed-up with a Cherry Coke, shaken not stirred, drizzled over a tall glass filled with ice).  Feel me.

Happy Happy New Year